Plain srewy.

Don't you just hate it when everything you've been busy typing disappears in barely 2 seconds when you accidentally shut down yer comp?

Ergh.. I fcuking hate that. Really.

Nuff said.

Fatigued and lethargic. Simply Unterrific.

I'm feeling lethargic right now.
I'm feeling pissed at someone for invalid reasons.
I'm repeating history.
I'm sorry that I did what I did on Monday.
I'm missing someone eventhough I really don't want to.
I'm missing the days where I sit and emo with Ever or Mandy.
I'm anticipating tomorrow.

The long anticipated Psychedelic Productions Reunion at TGIF.

Whee! I think I'm the first to blog about this (plus pictures!). Can't be too sure since I've not been checking out Alan's blog or any of the other Psychedelic blogs. Everyone was looking forward to this day, and everyone turned up looking oh-so-fine except for Ainaa, Thevanesh and Ms Foo who was down with fever that night.

That night turned out to be everything that I expected it to be and even more. It was just so much fun to be around all my friends again, and all the drama peeps just like the times where we slept, crammed and sweat-ed out our butts just to perfect one scene. Ahh.. the priceless memories.. How I wish we could perform our drama one more time. Wishful thinking that is huh? Ah well, I'm grateful enough that we got to give one stellar final performance at where else but Actors Studio itself. Right before Joe Hasham and on the same stage where Gavin Yap and the rest has acted before. We should be so proud of ourselves. I sure am!

Right, now for the pictures...!

Some pictures taken WHILE presenting ourselves as meal offerings for blood-sucking mosquitoes outside Mel's house WHILE waiting for Sherry to pick us up.


Haven't you noticed yet that we always start off with relatively civilized pictures which expectantly morphs into works of sheer lunacy?

Don't believe me? Hah! I've got proof! Don't we Mello?



Hmm.. wonder why I'm the only one acting weird here. Mel looks perfectly civilized. Hmph, she must be trying to out civilize me ! I kinda like the picture on the right. Must be me and my potential in becoming a gangster. Hahah!



Okay fine, I admit it. The pictures are proof enough. I'm the only looney one. Mel seems to be perfectly healthy and void of any deadly cerebral hemorrhages.


Mel's proudly showing off her wonderfullest bestest cuntedness pal in the world. Aww...how sweet of her... =p


Ooh look! It's not a bird, it's not a plane, it's just me being lame. Haha. Lame here not in the picture OKAY? I think the picture's pretty cool if you ask me. Not that you did, I'm just offering you my unrequested for opinion.



Such is the difference of day and night.


I'm sure kidnappers and robbers and serial rapists/murderers who weren't on duty that day would be slapping themselves silly at this moment . Such easy targets were we. Opportunity missed. Too bad too sad huh?


Alright enough pictures of both of us, though I'm really sure you'll never tire of our pictures. There are more to come ! Just this time, lunacy hits full blast. Yes, there are MORE of our kind...!

Meanwhile, here are pictures that THEY evil people took at TGIF without waiting for our arrival. Don't they know anything bout being fashionably late? Tsk tsk. Showing up extra early at restaurants proves all those gluttony accusations right.Heh. =p
They DO seem pretty fed up of waiting don't they? Patience is a virtue o young ones! =)
I like this picture of em. They look as though they were in some swanky club or something.

The apogee of the night has yet to come people.. it only starts when we start getting all worked up for the cams.

Honestly, I'm really so malas-ted to wait for all the pics to load. Trust me, it takes like practically half a million mammoth years just to get it to load and then it takes another snail's day for me to copy and paste the pic's html in the correct place.

But then again, I've never been known to possess this little something commonly known as...Patience. Reminds me why Pooh sent me that song "Patience' which I did enjoy listening to. Rather good song that is.

Hey, ya know what? Screw the pictures !I'm just gonna continue with my whole life story here. The pictures can come when I've finally implanted that thing called "Patience" in me. For now, you peeps are gonna be patient too! Hee, wonder why I feel so gleeful for making ya'll suffer. x)

I've always been wanting to blog about college, and also bout drama and also bout my muffins, and also bout the Christmas that never was, and also bout my outings with my babe Joyce, and also my , also my, also my, also my.....

Yeah, I've got a whole hella load of stuff to blog about, sadly I suffer from procrastination issues too that's why all those things which I constantly remind myself to blog about gets stashed away in this colossal mental box marked with a huge red "To Blog About" sign. Reality is, I might never get around to bloggin about all of em. MIGHT NOT. Sheesh, chill lah, don't prosecute people so fast can o not?

I was really good today. =)

Got back, had dinner (assam laksa btw, my fav!), went to bathe while multitasking ( sms-ing lah damnit, what were YOU thinking?) all in the span of less than two hours -Huge achievement okay? Considering I spent like 45 minutes trying to pick out split ends and staring at the compactness of my Cutie toilet roll Okay just kiddin here! You weren't deceived were you? I mean how could you be so dumb to be tricked into thinking that......................................

Cutie toilet rolls were compact? They're so friggin thin. Not the perfect word to describe but screw it for now, I can't think of a better adjective to describe it. I'm on a high right now if you haven't noticed yet.

* Laughs out loud to self. Can't believe I actually went on about toilet rolls my mum picks out.*

Wait ! This is absolutely not one of those diary entries I write in Standard One which goes something like this..

1 o clock- Lunch erm yummy..!
2 o clock- Tea Whee!!
3 o Clock- Forced to do homework while nibbling on biscuits.
4 o clock- Prepare for dinner. *Gluttonous smile*
5 o clock- Dinner!!! =))))))

Yeah, not exactly a precise journal entry picked out from my Standard one diary (not that I had one anyways) but you get the drift right? Also, it explains why I've always been a little on the pudgy side then and a whole lot more now. Happy Grace??

My point is... ! After going around in major circles around trees is to gloat about the fact that I actually managed to complete my daily routine in such a meagre amount of time and successfully logged on to the Internet before 7.30 just to finish up this post!

Bummer is.. I didn't get to it, instead, I got caught up reading this really really interesting and thought provoking post about well basically, love.

It was about this guy who got dumped by his girlfriend and started pleading and crying in public. Fascinating that some people called him a wuss and told him to suck up and get a testosterone implant, while the rest sympathised with him and gave words of consolation. What captivated my attention most was when questions were posed about the whole situation. (Ah, I remember this! Analytical thinking ! ) How long could have they been together? Did this guy love his gal so much hat he couldn't bear the thought of her breaking up with him? Was it just a fling and now the girl's leaving him? What could have possibly made this full grown man break down in public and God-forbid cry? Now, now, I really don't have a problem with guys crying cause calling them wimps or sissys just because they shed a few tears would just be like telling a woman that she can't speak up for her own rights and all. Whats with gender stereotyping right? Aren't we supposed to be equalists now?

Ahh.. questions questions questions. Such amusing time consuming quirks are they. I used to wish that answers come along oh-so-easily just by a gust of the wind or a swish of Su's hair FORMER hair I mean. See Su I acknowledged your deforestation! =) But now, armed with a whole new perspective on life and a much positive outlook, I'd rather the answers to life to come slow even if it means getting to the answers through the hard way. Life is a learning process right? Interpersonal communication is NOT! Hahahah! Sorry just had to.

On a lighter note, Orientation Night is on Friday.Can't wait for it.Am looking forward to watching the dance competition actually. Oh and I can't believe almost everyone in my class joined the Dance and Music Society ! =) Right now, practically three quarters of my class comprising those that I usually hang out with for lunch and chill out sessions are missing out on all the ECA booths. Probably cause we're either at Wei Hong's or Pyra's or God knows where else. Oh well, I'm not complaining. Been having loads of fun at college hanging out with all my great new found friends. They are just awesome these people! So many different personalities yet all so tight and chummie and united in our class. Can't wait to see what else life has in store for me. Till then, just keep watching this space even if it takes you a lifetime cause you'd probably want to be the first to find out bout the happenings in mah life. I'm gonna act hippity hop just like Robin ( this new quirky friend from Sabah which I'd definitely blog about later on sometime) puts it and say Peace Out !


Oh yeah another thing before I forget, I'm soooo pleased and proud of myself that Su finally admitted that it was mentally exhausting being friends with me. Must have been all those mental images I feed her. Seals, jumping goldfishes, milkshakes, tadpoles through hoops, medieval Ibiza, and playing the flute in Asia Cafe. Yeah, you name it, I got it. Su, just so you know, you've four more years down future ( can't be memory right) lane with me and you know I love ya! I suppose I could just tell you this tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow and the day after and the day after that and so on and on but to add to your agony, I'm gona do it here too! You know you love me too. *freaky Robin grin!*

To cap it off for real...



My beloved gals for life!

Such show offs and drama queens are we. =)

Psychedelics I love ya'll ! Keep the Pero pero spirit alive!

You didn't just see that. Let's pretend we all didn't. ;)


So whats wrong with givin each other some sisterly loving again? Wait, I forgot we were never sisters, we were always more than that and in between.



And then you have your ballroom dancer wannabes.


Oh and Su this is for you!

Damn.. Robin's freakyness is starting to rub off on me! Haha.

People this is the chick I'm gonna be hanging with for four years down the road and later on we're gonna be jetsetting across the world! Vogue, Fashion Week Milan, New York City, Times Magazine, Holla!

Okay I'd love to post up more pictures but my mum's nagging me to get off the comp now.

So seeya yoh!

New Year 2007.. Before and beyond..

I know it's a little late to speak of the New Year's celebration, but better late than never right? This year's new year has been pleasurable. Can't say it was that great or that it was the bomb diggity but what I can say was I had fun! Wasn't all that full blown merry making but somehow fun all the same. Just like how Mel puts it, start slow and build it up the next year. Claud's darn right, bring on Maison's the next year! *crosses fingers* Hopefully!!! Do pray for us!

If you wanna know, I FINALLY got my lazy bum around to editing and uploading ALL the pictures taken since the beginning of last year which includes all those priceless moments at Actors Studio Bangsar captured on film. I know I promised to do a whole coverage on Psychedelic Production's journey throughout the year but that promise has yet to be materialised. Sorry Qian! Soon soon! I've been busy having so much fun at college. This, I shall have to keep for another post. For now, it's just gonna be all the belated pictures of New Year's eve and beyond. Enjoy ! It's been so long since I've had a picture post. Thank your lucky stars for a non emo post. =)

Had lunch at Penang Village with mua mum on New Year's eve. In case you don't know, Penang Village is situated opposite Taipan business centre in Usj 10. To be more specific, it's just opposite Shakey's ( where I, an under aged minor in need of money used to serve as a non committal waitress who messed around with sundaes and knives.) The food's pretty good over here. I'd definitely recommend it. Not only does the food taste delicious, the presentation's also gratifying to the eyes. Why don't you just have a look for yourself?


Pai Tee for appetizers. Wasn't one of the best I've tasted but I can't be certain because of the lack of pekaness on the part of my receptors. Blame it on the flu bug.
My verdict: Could be improved but the chilli on it makes up for it.

Penang Village's special Nasi Lemak. One word- Yummy! This people is a total MUST try! Truly authentic Penang nasi lemak with asam prawns and delicious beef rendang. Mmm...



I can't really recall what these desserts were named exactly but I'm guessing it's something along the lines of Berry Juicy Ice and Mango Sunshine Delight. Weren't all that bad but nothing that special either.

The pricing here is really reasonable too besides the food being tasty. Whats not to like ? Without doubt, it's worth a second visit. =)

I was initially planning to go to Pyramid for the New Year's countdown with Mandy, Vivian and the rest of her USJ 13 gang, however transportation back was such a big issue that we decided to cancel the plans. Won't wanna get stuck in Kl Rapid riding back with Mat Rempits and all at 1 am right? Instead, I went with Mel to this rooftop party just somewhere near Pyramid. I say rooftops are the BEST for watching fireworks! You get a 360 view of the whole city from where you are. Undoubtedly, I was jumping with excitement ( well not exactly literally, perhaps I was grinning my jaws off) since it was my first time watching fireworks live during any sort off countdowns. (Yes, we've gone over this before.) I wasn't entirely overwhelmed by emotion till the point of breaking down and getting oh-so-sentimental( I know Su does, or does she not? Couldn't remember which it was hahah!) by the sight of the fireworks though I had to admit I was pretty psyched. Fireworks are pretty. Period.

I recorded some videos of the fireworks but since the Internet is lagging so much, I couldn't even be bothered to upload em to You Tube. Sorry, no videos of pretty fireworks for ya'll to watch. I'll try to post em up next time lah.

Since Mandy and I did not get to celebrate New Year's Eve together we decided to go for dinner on New Year's day itself. How ingenious of us yes we know. =)

Leo's was the place of our choice.


Had some kinda fizzy soda drinks. Mine's the blue one called Blue Soda. How direct. Hahah. Mandy's the red one with some fancy pancy Hawaiian Sunrise name. We took some pictures on my new phone but it was malfunctioning so I couldn't retrieve it.

The original plan was to head to Leo's for ice cream and desserts since we heard that the gelato there good. However, plans aren't always meant to be followed out right? There's this little something called spontaneity which spices things up and thus we were headed off to this quaint little Mexican restaurant called Las Carretas with Pooh and Ever for some New Year drinks. What? It IS New Year right? Every new beginning calls for a celebration. =)

The place is really nice! We have to come here for whoever else's birthday alright! They even have free flow of tacos and salsa!

A view of the place from where we were seated. We got the only high tables at the entire place.We wanted to sit at the other end of the restaurant where they had a disco ball but it was fully packed.

This really unique 'chandelier' made out of Whisky bottles. Cool huh

The bar area. I love the cool lighting. They even have bottles stuck up there in the ceiling.

If you look really closely you can see me and Ever's reflections in the mirror. I love the deco here. It's so dessert themed. Is that even Mexican? Hmm... I suppose so..


Mandy and I. She ordered the Tequila Sunrise while I had my pina coloda. I prefered her fruity drink compared to mine which was overly sweet and thick for my liking.


Ever and his Bombay Sapphire Gin. I like !!!

Pooh posing with his Chivas Regal. I think that's the one if I'm not mistaken. Pooh here has been camwhoring a whole lot lately. He's even mastered the art of doing that. Don't believe me? Just check out his Friendster. One too many poserlicious pictures of him there pouting and preening at the camera. Worse than me also lah. Hahah! And you were complaining that my girls and I do it, Pooh?

To cap off the night, we had Bailey's . Tastes like chocolate milk to me. Hahah. Mandy's face got really red after that. Me? Even though people say I blush easily, surprisingly, my face doesn't show on me when I drink. That's a good thing.

That was practically it for my New Year's celebrations. Let's hope next year's New Year celebrations tops it off. For now, I really need some sleep. Have been doing this all night. Toodles.

I'm diggin it. One word- awesome.

Just like these pretty super yummy muffins,

College is nothing short of AWESOME!

Will elaborate sometime later. I'm just soaking in all the fun, the drive and all the positive vibes I get from being in college.

This whole new life is GREAT!

I'm lovin' it!

=)

The Journey Begins

Today was my first day at college~!

It was well.... better than I had expected! =)

Truth to be told, I was feeling a little jittery at the thought of embarking on this whole new chapter of life just the day before. But of course there was the whole exhilaration and thrill of starting college too.
I woke up an hour earlier than I had planned to and couldn't seem to go back to sleep anymore since I was so overwhelmed by the anticipation to start the day!

Thank God I have Su there as a companion and also as a form of familiarity. The people there were all so friendly which was an extreme plus factor. Su and I got to know this girl from Brunei named Tash who spoke French (ooh sexay) and who didn't know that durians grew on trees .Rather peculiar ( She bit me on my arm and I threatened to bite her nose back ) girl she is. In a very nice way of course! Funny thing was she told me that she found me intimidating. Supposedly, I appeared studious. God, do I look THAT studious? Hahah.

There was also this guy who took us on the campus tour and told us to stay away from this bitch who'd come after us if we put our fingers on the glass panes. HAHA. Alan, seriously that guy reminds me of you!

My class is pretty small if I have to say. There are probably only about 5 guys in it? The rest of the guys are all from either Computing or Architecture courses. There are so many other students from all over the world! Did I mention there were these two certain hotties from Maldives and Iran? The best part is French students are flying in next week! I've gotta practice my Bonjours and Mercis. Erm, yeah that's bout the only words in my French dictionary right now. I just might sign up for the French language classes held on weekends at the college. Yup, they DO have that. Does YOUR college have that?

We had some teambuiding games after the ice breakers and guess what I got from that?

I got a piece of flesh ripped out from my left palm because this one dude was trying to snatch my balls. Well, my team's balls. =D
(Oh Qian, my team was called 'Hotties' in case you were wondering . *grins*)

I only have classes up til 10am on Thursday! No classes at all on Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays. That's a really good thing! Hmm.. I might be able to fit in some part time work here. Whadya think?

Oh oh !

And the BEST thing is, I will not have to sit for another MATH or BM paper anymore!!! YAY for me! No Math. No Math. No Math. Three cheers for me!

Bad thing is, I've got an English Placement Test on Monday which lasts for TWO whole hours and ten minutes only because they don't trust us( people using forecast results) to get an A or even a B in our actual SPM results. Yeah, we're talking bout the Malaysian standard English paper. Sure, we'll all fail cause we don't even know how to fill in the blanks with 'a' or 'an'.

I think this post is beginning to sound like a five minutes of brushing my teeth and sitting on the toilet bowl. Wait, I take 30 minutes or longer for that. Did I just reveal that to you? Oh well, I guess you already know anyway. I'm gonna grab some pretty muffins now. So tata!

Anticipating A Year Ahead That Will Top Year 2006.

I don't intend to do a whole "Hi! testing ! testing 123 ! This is my new blog yada yada " so I'll just get straight to the point starting from where I left off at my old blog to save you all the eyeache of reading too much.

The following are excerpts from my blog in Friendster ( requests from a certain Missy QY) .Have a read and you will realise why I blogged there instead of here. Note: I was going through something called emonessity the other night. That said, ain't it all pretty much self explainatory?

But I AM glad that I did pour out my feelings yesterday night, even though what you are about to read may come as a shock to a few of you out there. It really felt like a huge weight lifted off my shoulders and a huge burden had ceased. Coming clean ain't all that bad after all. =) I should be amazed.

Well, it IS getting rather late so I really can't go on blogging much tonight, even though there is much to say about tonight and the farewell party we just had for dear Stephie who will be leaving on a jetplane to Taunton, UK soon to pursue her dreams. There are also my thoughts about the future, the present, and the past to blog about, pictues to post up and all of that. But that whole lot will just have to wait till today morning yeah?

I've been spending my whole night editing the templates for this blog. Can't really say it's all done and settled with but most of it is I guess, I hope. This was not the initial template chosen for this blog of mine, the one I first chose was a really quirky and cool one but I decided that it was a bit too colourful and loud to suit my more emo-ish moods in the end. Perhaps I shall give it a try in the near future. For now, I'm digging this one here. Script like... ooh I like! =)

Anyways, here are the posts... Be warned, there are three posts all together. Each labelled highly emoistic. Proceed at your own risk. I'll be posting up the posts in the sequence of the ones first written til the last yeah? Do indulge..

Post #1.

Title: Smiley faces.
How can you be sure that when someone smiles, he/she smiles like they mean it? Sometimes a smile can just be an empty facade, meaningless, like drinking from an empty cup. Even as a person smiles, that doesn't mean that the person is happy. Perhaps she found something funny or amusing, but does smiling or laughing make a person happy? People go on in life every day smiling their way through, but no one ever knows what they really feel, if they feel a deep sense of sadness inside or maybe they feel hatred or anger. No one really knows. Well it's true that no one can take you where you must go yourself. No one can understand you better than you can yourself. Satisfaction is only temporary, yet people chase out every temporary high just to catch that one moment of bliss. Does conspicuous success guarantee happiness? Does all the money in the world bring joy? Does love evoke true happiness? The saying goes that with love everything falls in place. Love is everywhere in this world, from your parents, from friends, from all those who care about you. If that is the case, why doens't that seem enough? Why do people yearn for that someone special to share their life with? Why must there always be that 'someone'? Why? Why? Why? So many questions yet so little answers. Questions are perpetual in this world. Nothing satisfies our curiosity. I bet every single person in this world has at one point or another question life. What inquisitive people are we. Is life really one big enigma ? Obscure in meaning, indirect and never ever glaringly obvious. There are certain people who says life is simple. Those are the ones who accepts life as it is. Never questioning anything that life has to offer. Maybe these group of people are those who are done questioning life, and decides to just settle with what they have. Is life really that simple? Or are we just the ones complicating it. Is this savage hunger and appetite for satisfaction insatiable? Maybe we're just greedy.
Sure, there'd be so many other spurious and cliched rationalizations but once again, who's to say whats right and whats wrong? Nothing is right or wrong, thinking makes it so. The mind decieves right? It's funny how many times I've attempted to deceive my own self. Thinking that something was when it wasn't and wasn't when it was. How utterly ridiculous of me, yes I admit to that.
We all have our little moments of fancy and pretension, and the next thing you know, you're coldly furious, overcome with rage. How fickle and capricious are we humans. it's true, emotions can overwhelm someone so much to the point where it pushes you off the brink. Someone once said, we are not flawlessly beautiful, rather we're beautifully flawed.
A person's heart is fragile. It's delicate, a human soul. Even a person who appears to be cold and aloof. Deep down inside, in the confines of his/her own sanctuary, that builded wall breaks down and the many layers of armour falls apart. And all you have is a raw and honest soul. Those who build walls around them are those who have probably been hurt so bad that they are afraid to open up and be vulnerable enough to allow anyone or anything to touch them ever again. They find it hard to open up so they walk away. Most times it's a person that causes this. All it takes is another person to hurt someone to make em come undone. Fall into pieces. More so, if that person is someone you care about or worse still love. Perhaps that might be confused with limerence or infatuation but I'm sure you'll know deep inside if you loved someone. My favourite quote so far..."I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. Delicious ambiguity". ~ Gilda Radner, 1946-1989 I've never much agreed with the saying that loving someone means letting em go. But after so long, I finally see. Sure, it may be one of the hardest things ever to do but holding on might cause even more misery. Some things break you down but in the end it causes you to become a stronger person.
My decision remains, though I've strayed from it for a bit. It will remain for now and i foresee that it'll remain for a very long time.

( Edit: I realized that I didn't give enough credit to Lynn when I wrote this post. "Someone once said, we are not flawlessly beautiful rather we are bautifully flawed" was taken from Lynn's blog. That line made a huge impression on me when I read one of her posts. Also, that quote from Gilda Radner was found on her blog. Thank you so much Lynn for posting up such beautiful posts that made great impressions on me. )

There were two comments on that first post which I'd like to share.

Comment#1:
hey tough gal ...wats up with all d thinking la , complicateing things only ... haha ya , i understand n noe dat our hearts r fragile ... u n me r alike , we build wals n make sure their as hard as ever so dat no one can break through them n have a special place in our hearts ...d thing is d walls will go dwn some day , it might be 2day , tmr or even 10 years from now ... d imp thing is when it goes dwn we let things fall in place n not build d walls back ...of course not everything will go our way but 1 day there will be a happy ending , jz a matter of time ... u asked y we need someone special ... ill try 2 answer dat for u ..when things r hard or even easy we want 2 share them , so we do dat with our frens n fam but sometimes we need dat special someone 2 make us happier n even give us a push when we need it ...some places in d heart our frens n fam cant touch ..dat place is for d special someone waiting for u ... i hope i answered it for u ...n when we ever do fall n break , theres alot of poeple 2 help us up again ... fam n frens ... especially d frens dat stick with u n make sure dat ur ok every single time ... these r d frens dat pick u up n wait with u till ur up on ur feet ...d thing is 2 open up , if we don open up then theres no point...haha , next time don la write so long , causeing me probs ...u noe i lazy rite haha , k , tc
Posted by: rudra January 2, 2007 11:59 AM

Comment #2:

There are signs to tell the diff between a real smile and a fake one.
A real smile would pull the edge of our lips upwards.
Our cheecks go upwards too and form that round hard muscle just below our eyes.
The corner of our eyes will crinkle like crows feet.
A really true smile will show you teeth.
Also, a genuine smile would cause a person to forget about their self-consciousness - Let loose and not be bothered about how they look like. which cud mean showing your teeth, eyebags, wrinkles and small upside down U-shaped eyes.
I read it somewhere a while ago. Smiles heal all wounds. I only got to scan tru yr post so.. I'm not sure actually what u wrote. Sorry =)
Worry less. I'm starting to like life. Don't go down my old path. Thinking too much really just sux.. It's like reminding you of sad things. and u taught me not to =D
Thanks for being a friend.
Posted by: Leon January 2, 2007 09:02 PM

I never did reply on those two comments yet because what they both said got me thinking.

Post #2:
Title:Time flies really fast right?
Maybe I'm just being pensive because two of my good friends are already leaving on a jet plane. One heading to UK and another to the US. Well, it'll be six full not to mention long months till I'll be able to see them again. That's half a year. But time flies right? I won't even notice that they've been gone right? Maybe not, I know Tim just said that to comfort me. I can't imagine what life will be like without them around yet. But we'll see what life has in store for me. I know I'll definitely be missing them so darn much. I won't be able to sms Tim when my lecture is boring to listen to him go on about how much he loves his gf, yes, it does get a bit boring at times but that's what makes talking to him so special. I never thought we would be the best friends we are today. It all happened so abruptly. One day I was just at loggerheads with him threatening to knock all the life out of him, and the next day I poured out my whole sob story to him because somehow or another I felt like I could trust him and tadaa we became good friends from that point on. Who am I suppose to call if the car so happens to burst into flames in the middle of the road now? Who will i send an sos to if I happen to take the wrong bus or the wrong route? Sigh... I really appreciated how he could stand all my emo-ness, even when I lost my temper at him, he'll take it with a smile and laugh it off. Whenever I complained to him that I was fat, he'd assure me that I wasn't and offered to go jogging with me. Whenever I got into my emo moods( read:now) and gave him my whole the-earth-is-coming-to-an-end sob story, he'll give me another revised optimistic story back. Even when I was broken in pieces over that jerk of a guy, he'd tell me that the guy wasn't worth it and consoled me in all the dumbest ways ever. he'd probably never read this ever but if he does ever come upon this page, you'd know that I appreciate you so SO much as a friend. You were a person who helped me get past all my insecurities and all when i was in form 3. Thank you so much. Sincerely from my heart.

And the comments...

Comment#1:
hey boss ,leting someone go is not d easiest thing to do ...in fact its d hardest thing 2 do .....its even harder when their ur best fren but dats life , its full of changes ...its a matter of how u deal with it i noe u realy gona miss them buts dats good in fact .. d time they come back will be much much more meaningfull 2 u n infact a much sweeter moment !!! dat time im sure u will be very happy , haha till dat time comes u go on with ur life .... cause dats d way it works u noe me i go straight 2 d point ... haha so all i gota say is d people who u let go will always return 2 u n it will be a much much sweeter moment !!!
Posted by: rudra January 2, 2007 11:37 AM

Comment #2:
Yeah you're absolutely right.It is one of the hardest things to do, yet it has to be done. That's growing up right? With every new beginning there will be an ending. Hmm... people whom you let go will always return to you? i'm not too sure i fully agree with that. Thanks anyways. =)
Posted by: Florence January 2, 2007 11:42 AM

Comment #3:
haha , they will return jz a matter of u believeing it ...if their ur best fren n i noe they definately are , they will return 2 u n bright up ur life again ...its hard without ur best fren .. life jz doesnt seem whole ... but when they come back it will be whole again ya it is a process we need 2 go through 2 grow up ... im sure we will pass it with ease .. haha k , tc .....
Posted by: rudra January 2, 2007 12:06 PM

Post #3:
Title:I Want A New Beginning.

It's time for a new beginning, a whole new start to life. In just another day, I'd be embarking on another whole new journey in my life. It's time for all the excess baggage I've been carrying for too long to be disposed off and never to be found again. Year 2006 was like a roller coaster for me. ( cliche yes everyone says that hmm perhaps i'd try the stock market?) I had a few ups and quite a bit more of really low lows. To blame it all on SPM stress would just pose as a lame excuse though it did partially contribute to the whole dramarama. I don't usually do this whole pouring my heart out in black and white because well.. it's just a way of me protecting myself . You can freely accuse me of building walls and wearing armours cause I don't really mind neither do I deny the fact that I do. Oh look I just pointed it out myself that it's a fact. Okay, stop. My point is, I don't really get round to telling people how i really feel neither do I express myself effectively. Like what I'm doing now actually, going around bushes and trees. But most of all, I don't fancy the thought of people judging me just by what they read when in fact they know nothing close to the actual story. What I write and what they read are just fragments of the tale not meant to be told. But people do jump to conclusions cause being human myself, I catch myself doing that too sometimes. I've always been a I don't give a damn what people think person, yes I still am in most aspects like choices or decisions you make in life, however, I can't deny that I do care how people perceive me. But what the heck, it's a fact that we're all destinied to be judged one way or another so from this point on, I'm just going to come clean the way I want to. I don't want to be that person who walks away just because she finds it hard to open up and make her feelings known anymore. Three or more cheers for me. =) Maybe my new motto should be "Say it like I want to." Hahah maybe not.
This post started out sort off emo-y but I think I'm starting to feel better already getting rid of all this emotional junk in me. It's been doing me more harm than good both mentally and psychically. This is my 3rd post tonight, as you can read for yourself, the previous too were full blown emo and I really should be blogging at my usual blogdrive blog or new blogspot blog but instead I'm blogging here at Friendster. One thing I've realised is that my posts here at Friendster tend to lean more towards the Emo category whereas posts at my regular blogs are all happy fun moments. Complete with narcissictic exhibitionist pictures gleefully taken to post up. I've given much thought to this and I finally realised the reason for that. Well you see,hardly anyone ever reads my blog here at Friendster ,well at least none of the friends that I usually have to face and all ands thats the reason why I spill all the sad beans here. Just like I've said in the above, I share the good but never the bad. So all they see of me is the smiley happy-go-lucky crazy girl but never the pensive over thinking emo freak that I do morth into occasionally. That's not gonna happen now, it's too much trouble hiding this other side of me, you guys are gonna have to take me as a whole. Heh. Hope you can handle that.
Wow, this is the one of the few moments I've felt like I could express what I really wanted to say in words. I must have a thing for blogging under the influence of this Emo-nessity. Emoness must be good for my writing.I shall say that this year's new year was one of the best I've experienced so far. The best is yet to come. I'm optimistic and enthusiastically awaiting The Best new year ever. To stay true to my new year resolution, let me share a little secret with you. I'd get terribly emo every single new year come. Maybe I'm bad with goodbyes or maybe I'm not ready to move on. Maybe maybe. Hmm.. I'm not too sure myself or maybe I'm just not ready to admit that I am all of that. Okay fine, I am. A little. =) So, as I was saying, emo as I was every single new year, I'd stay in my room and cry my eyes out. Haha funny how it sounds now that I say it out loud. If you really wanted to know, yes I did it too this year. But hold on, it's not as bad as it sounds, I didn't spend New year cropped up in my room alone, I was determined to stop all this nonsense and go out and have some fun even though I wasn't exactly in the mood for it at that time. And boy I didn't regret a single moment of it!
It was the first time I've witnessed fireworks up live during countdowns in my entire 16 years of living and it was worth every single minute of it. It was a whole 5 mins of pure elation. =) Besides, we were on a rooftop which there were fireworks to watch from every angle! Yes, I'm easy to please I know.
I'll spare the details of the whole new year I had spent with my beloved friends in the next post. Right now, I need shut eye real badly. Emos will continue tomorrow. I'm out.

And the comments again..

Comment#1:
oi ! im not commenting on dz post k...its ur new begining so u write a new chapter in ur life as days go by ...im sure ur new begining will be awesome n great for u so u go ahead live ur life d way u want 2 !!rock on , haha ! k , tc
Posted by: rudra January 2, 2007 12:11 PM

Comment #2:
"Well you see,hardly anyone ever reads my blog here at Friendster ,well at least none of the friends that I usually have to face and all ands thats the reason why I spill all the sad beans here."
Hm, do u know that we get emails everytime u update?
Well, it may sound weird but.. glad to hear your emo side. Makes you sound human.
I'm bad at goodbyes too.. and sometimes it might be best not to say goodbye at all - to spare the "OOooo, I"ll nvr see you again" part.
But we've all got our own paths to take..
Posted by: Grace January 2, 2007 03:27 PM

Comment #3:
Haha Gracey.. yeah that's the thing, I switched off the publicize mode but sadly it didnt work so yeah, I spammed everyone's emails about my blogs.
For you to say that, I think I've never much shown any emotions huh? Weird man how I was. Anyways, Grace here's one thing i've never gotten around to say to you. I just wanna thank you for that time in CF Rally 04. Ya know what happened right?
That's true we should not say goodbye instead we shall replace it with see ya again. Keep it optimistic eh? =D
Posted by: Florence January 3, 2007 12:32 AM

Comment #4:
Ruddy! I foresee that my new beginning will be filed with more sessions at "our fav spot" in Taipan right? Hahah! Thanks for all the comments and opinions you gave, considering you hardly say anything much everytime you tag or comment. Lol. =D
Posted by: Florence January 3, 2007 12:38 AM

Yup, that's it. Three full long emo posts to let everything I've been holding in for far too long out. I can't wait to start blogging about my awesome New Year's celebration and also college! Yes people, college starts tomorrow !! I'm ecstatic for the new experience yet all the same not too willing to give up the late nights and going outs just yet. But life has to go on, like it or not. We just have to make the best out of it. Just like Qian said in her blog, look forward but keep the past in mind. That's exactly what I and all of us should do.

We're all embarking on our own journey and adventure from this moment on to fulfill our dreams, ambitions and goals. So good luck to all of you my dear friends! The times spent with each and every single one of you will most certainly be cherished and kept in this heart shaped box of mine. May year 2007 be a year filled with joy, happiness, love, friendship, accomplishments and fulfilled dreams/goals. The best has yet to come and I'm anticipating it this year! =)